Free your mind...Your ass will follow

I just had a positive relationship conversation with Husband! We both admitted we both have things to work on.  I grown up relationship conversation!
He chose his words carefully and I kept a relaxed mind.

I've decided that I'm going to do my best to not "over share" details of my relationship with husband.  Just wanted to put it out there that life is good.

Much is going on in peoples lives around me.
Some good, some that totally sucks and some holy shit I can't believe this is happening already!

Life doesn't wait til we're  ready... keeping a peaceful mind

Happiness and Love

Hibernation day 1

There has been a lot of crap going around.  Stomach flu with 3 different flavors and you can try them all! A variety of colds are available.

At the beginning of the week I was starting to feel sickish but I figured it was just from missing the weekend.
When I still felt sickish this morning I figured it was time to hibernate.

Hopefully the chillin and the senile grandpa will be ok in my absence at work.
They're pretty self sufficient. Some may think they work harder than I do. ;)

I am however working from home (in between blogging).  I have the luxury of coping with the boredom of my job while I work at home.

Happiness and Love y'all

When you do bad you get sad…

I think it’s safe to say that most of us have ignored that little voice that tells us to rethink what we’re about to do right before we do something stupid.

Sometimes that little voice screams at me and I still ignore it.  I almost always regret it when I ignore that voice.

Most of these situations are related to my insecurities.  I get suspicious of everything!

I am spending a lot of time working on this.

A good friend of mine keeps telling me “If you look for something hard enough you’ll find it”

I need to look for the positive instead of the negative.  I spend so much time and energy being suspicious and trying to make sure nobody makes me look like a fool, when in fact I’m the one making myself look like a fool by acting like that.

It’s exhausting thinking in that mind set! Always wondering if people mean what they say, if they’re talking about you behind your back blah blah blah .

Of course people are gonna talk.  They get bored with their own lives so they need some entertainment or someone to hate on.

I’m starting to give less of a fuck what people think but, I’m hoping someday to get to that peaceful place where I won’t give a fuck at all.

Yay me!!

Names have been changed to protect the crazy.

Phone rings

"Yes boss"

"God damnit I need you to come here"

Never a good thing to hear from your boss, but for some reason it didn't bother me I thought he just needed to vent about someone else.

"What up?"

"Shut the door"

Still not bothered.

"Ms. Crackerjack just spent 10 minutes bitching about you."

I almost got mad but instead I laughed.  Not sure what came over me but I liked it.
Normally I would have went to Ms. Crackerjack and snapped.  I didn't even get defensive.

"She said you were difficult to work with and won't do anything she asks you to because you don't like people telling you what to do."

"Well I can't argue with her there." I laughed it off and explained my side of the story.

I honestly didn't care what she had said about me!

WFT? How did that happen??

Of course I was still a smartass and went around telling everyone how difficult I am to work with.  I figure it's my reward for keeping my shit together.

One test of many

I’m in my cube chanting like an idiot

“Everything will work out, be positive”

I’m fucking positive I’m pissed!

“Everything will work out, be positive”

These fuckers took more of my money!

“Everything will work out, be positive”

I’ve got bills to pay n shit!

“Everything will work out, be positive”

At least the power company can’t cut me off yet…maybe this shit is working

Happiness and love, happiness and love

My gang of sluts love me for who I am

It's no big secret that I'm a smartass.  Smartasses tend to have smartass friends.  A gang of sluts with a gang supervisor, for example

At first I thought my fellow gang members would talk shit about my new outlook on life, but so far they haven't.

My biggest challenge will be to stop giving a fuck about people's perception of me.  They're all fucked up themselves so why should I care what they think of me? (my husband will be so proud!)

I need to stop feeling like everyone is better than I am.  We're all equally fucked up in our own way, some people are just better actors.

Traditions

So it seems that I have created my own tradition of starting a new blog every new year.  Each year I hope things will be different and I will keep up with the new blog, each year I fail.

This year will be different, damnit!!
I'm trying a different take on life this year.  You see I was taught a lesson this past year.  My Boxer Ozzy developed a Mast Cell tumor. We caught it early and the surgery removed it all, but it was a very traumatic experience that woke my ass up!
I need to enjoy life and have fun instead of worrying it away.


I'm really working hard on being more positive about things.  I'm taking time to appreciate the blessings that I have been given.

My to do list

Grow up! (not totally)
It's time to become more responsible financially.
Get caught up on bills, start saving, you know the grown up type stuff.

Get in touch with my inner hippy (insert stoner joke here)
Be peaceful.  Stop thinking all the damn time!
Stop letting the negative thoughts, guilt and range consume me.

Be a better friend (to others and most of all myself)
Be nice damnit!
Realize that I'm a good person but I'm human and will make mistakes and let people down, the people who truly care will stick around.
Stop giving until it hurts.  I'm always gonna do what I can to help others, but I have to set limits.  I need to consider my family and my needs before others.
Yes Mom, I realize this is what you've been trying to get through to me all these years

Stand by my man (after all, he did promise to put up with my bullshit til death do us part)
I need to be more accepting of who he is if I expect him to accept me for who I am.  I need to make sure to consider him before others. I have been guilty of this and I'm not proud, but it's time to change that.

Work it! (love thy self and "Do Work"!)
I really need to become more confident in myself and take more pride in my job.  It may not be my dream job but it pays the bills.
I also need to accept myself for who I am both inside and out.  If I feel better on the inside I'll feel better on the outside and vice-versa.

I have a hell of a list to work through!  I figure if I take it a bit at a time I might be able to get through it.



I hope you'll join me on my journey...
Until then, be happy damnit!!